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did you hear about this? jung texted me this morning about biden and his comments about subway trains and planes. so of course i looked it up. and boy, the white house already has released an apology for biden’s remarks. damn it biden! keep it together! come on!



  1. Magic Nursery Babies ( toys)
  2. Alf – enough said
  3. Garbage kid cards
  4. Toyota Corollas 1987 – especially shades of brown
  5. Mili Vanilli


  1. thick socks around the ankle all smushed – unless you’re a cheerleader or an 80’s aerobics instructor.  no need for them
  2. long frizzy hair – more for guys.  like metal rocker hair
  3. side ponytails – WTF was going on with that?


  1. jeans from the 80’s – acid wash and even the way you wore them either rolled up or safety pinned
  2. shoulder pads – on women’s clothes, including tshirts 
  3. McRibs – I may possibly be in the minority but I always thought they tasted funny.
  4. big bangs
  5. first generation hyundai – from what I heard, the car would come to a smoking stop if you drove with the AC and radio on during the summer time


  1. lunchables (gross)
  2. my little pony
  3. rubix cube (simply impossible)
  4. parachute pants
  5. aresenio hall




  1. Beverly Hills Teens (cartoon)
  2. Moonlighting (detective show)
  3. Tinkerbell BO-PO (brush off- peel off) nail polish
  4. Skip It
  5. Happy Meal boxes or Rotary phones (both good)


  1. DOWNTOWN JULIE BROWN – need i say more?
  2. the delorean – back to the future whatttt
  3. michael jackson – the black one.
  4. boomboxes at home, on the streets, everywhere!


  1. penny loafers – most comfortable/versatile footwear in the history of mankind.
  2. jem – a classic good vs. evil cartoon. 
  3. MacGyver – wouldn’t we all feel safer if MacGyver came back into our lives.
  4. toys r us jingle – how fantastic was that jingle.  You know you’re signing along
  5. Movies like breakfast club – no explanation necessary


  1. plastic lunchboxes with superheroes on them
  2. slap bracelets
  3. tiger video games
  4. pump shoes
  5. color changing clothing – You know…You whear a green shirt and someone walks up, puts their hand on you and the heat from their hand changes your shirt from green to lighter green


  1. Have no-neck and have to wear clothes that reveal your neck at all times? (you can’t get surgery or do anything to try to fix the physical problem)
  2. Have kankles that make you look like you have logs as legs and have to wear clothes that reveal your legs at all times? (you can’t get surgery or do anything to try to fix the physical problem)

GH: ok so this is kind of tough. both choices suck a lot. but for sure for sure, i would go with the short neck. why you ask? if there’s anything i hate (so much that it makes me sort of shiver thinking about it) on a human body is kankles. motherfucking kankles. for those who don’t know, kankles are pretty much tree stumps. for legs. there is no ankle, calf, knee, etc. it’s just kankle. <insert kankle picture, i can do that> how gross is this? i haven’t seen it on girls a lot but i’ve seen a lot of guys with kankles. i’m not sure why it disgusts me so much. but i really want to go up to them and tell them they shouldn’t be allowed to wear shorts anymore. it’s a big turn off for me. ugh.

now i know, short necks are fairly gross too. it would like i was shrugging all the time. but my disdain for kankles leaves me no choice. my hands are tied. arm is twisted. so yeah, i’d be the hunchback of notre dame with some non-tree stump FINE legs.

..i know. ridiculous.

**i apologize if i’ve offended anyone with my harsh tone and words about kankles.

JK:  I will totally have kankles over no neck any day.  My reasoning is fairly simple.  I feel that people are more likely to notice the no-neck thingy before they notice the kankles.  This reasoning is solely based on the fact neck area is more likely in the field of vision for most people than the kankles.  Of course kankles are bad and most people would not want them, it was on the infamous “list” that Ross made about Rachel on Friends….

so somewhere in history, someone coined thirsty thursday. most likely a college kid because let’s be for real, who’s had a friday class? and if you did? who actually went? (i had one in freshman year. yeah, grades weren’t so good for that class) the weekend pretty much started thursday after your last class. then you swear off alcohol for the rest of your life only to be drinking again several hours later. repeat until monday comes (when you realize you’re late for class).

nyu, here i come! thirsty thursday! let’s hope i don’t end up like this kid. ten bucks says this kid doesn’t remember a thing? anybody? anyone? no? ok.


so one of my favorite snl skits is the surprise birthday party one. it’s just so damn good. i don’t think it needs any further explaining.  

and yes, you can catch me saying “oOooOoOOHhhhhh myyyyy goooooooossshhh”

this is really old. but a friend of mine sent this link to me a while ago: rock god
freddie mercury, i can see. i don’t know if he’s my #1 but he definitely rocked out hard. definitely top 10 worthy. 
elvis presley is definitely a rock god. a different rock god compared to others but a rock god during his times. 
then there’s jon bon jovi. JON BON JOVI?!! what the eff? how is this guy above jimi hendrix? i’d even put otis redding above him. otis redding rocked out during shows. no offense to all those worldwide jon bon jovi fans but seriously. come on. i think after the superbowl halftime show, bruce springsteen definitely should be up there. did anyone see his knee slide?
if bon jovi’s up there, i’m not sure how this rock god’s definitely not up there.

so i go through phases with phrases. say that 5 times fast. 

ok, it’s actually not that hard to say 5 times fast.  

i have several that i’ve been saying in place of actual sentences. and i have one that i’ve been saying every other sentence but it’s slowing dying out (by slowly dying out i mean i say it frequently but not every other sentence). this phrase is SUCK IT.  

i first picked it up from 30 rock (great show btw). and have been using it beyond its intended use. it’s a great phrase. you can use it for any moment. examples:  

in anger: 
joe: you smell! 
me: suck it!  

in jubilation: 
joe: damn, you’re right. 
me: whhattt! suuuuckkk ittttt!  

to quiet someone: 
joe: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah lbah balhhf;aliwheg;aoiwhga;owehasfasf
me: suck it  

as exclamation: 
(trash talk. ping pong match. win match.) 
me: SUCK IT!!  

in a sentence: 
me: you can suck it.  

so you can see WHY i’ve come to love this phrase. but i realize, i’m always surrounded by real adults. real working adults. who are in charge of my career. probably won’t understand my love for suck it. so with that i say:
so i was hanging out with fam yesterday. and i told them how i’ve drastically decreased my coffee intake. the main reason for this is because i’m trying to be less dependant on other things, mainly cigarettes, legal drugs, illegal drugs, alcohol (always a losing battle on weekends), etc. BUT i didn’t tell them that. instead, i gave them a more scientific answer from an authoritative source*.

that’s right. 3 cups a day has a major effect on your breasts. and every cup after that too. now if you know/seen me, i can’t afford to shrink my boobs. no back problems here! i’ll take all the boobies i can get. ..only to make mine bigger. i would totally post a pic of my boob area. but we don’t know each other that well yet. maybe after 150 posts. or 100 …

*what? yeah, it’s fox news. suck it. where are all my tri-state area fox 5 morning news people at?! mike woods, what! 
September 2021