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When I found out I was going to be “transitioned” out of my current position, after couple of days crying, I had sent out an email to friends and family about my situation.  Then someone forwarded me this site called Lemonade the movieIt really gave me the courage and hope that I really needed at the time.  I’m sure it was a way for God to reassure me that things were gonna be okay and that this was happening for a reason beyond my limited understanding.  I’ve been going thru a bit of an emotional and spiritual discovery in the past couple of weeks.  When I have some more time to spare, which I will in couple of weeks, I’ll definitely post more things about my process and progress.

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Learned this song couple of weeks ago at the Metro retreat.   Probably one of the most powerful retreats I’ve been in really really really long time.  Then I couldn’t get this song out of my head.  I’ve been listening to it non-stop and the part that keeps repeating in my head is, “All of my life, in every season, You are still God, I have a reason to sing, I have a reason to worship.”

We are called to sing and worshp Him thru everything.  It doesn’t matter where we are in life, we are to worship Him.  But that is much easier said than done.  I am still wrestling with God and trying to make sense of the things that are happening in my life.  I don’t have all the answers.  Far from it.  Sometimes, it’s more confusing, conflicting, complicated because of my faith. 

Then I saw this video with Jill McClogrhy’s testimony and I felt so small.  This woman who clearly went thru so much more than I have, is able to sing and worship.  That’s reverance.  That’s strength.  That’s hope.  That’s faith.  Where is God in my life?  Where have I placed Him in my life?  Clearly not where He truly belongs.   Maybe that is why my brokenness and shattered dreams seem so much bigger than Him.   

August 2019
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